15 Signs Of The Kind Of True Love You Only Find Once In A Lifetime
True Touch Lifestyle | ShutterstockWhile true love is often romanticized as something grand and explosive to an extent, the truth is that it's much more profound and quiet. Lasting love is rooted in mutual respect and emotional maturity, where couples grow together as well as individually, and stay connected through shared commitment and trust.
Though the signs of the kind of true love you only find once in a lifetime may not show themselves immediately, as they aren't as in-your-face as we're told to believe, when couples finally recognize them, their connection can only grow. Because when couples have a willingness to navigate challenges together, their love is resilient and meant to last forever.
Here are 15 signs of the kind of true love you only find once in a lifetime
1. You've stopped wondering if there's someone better out there for you
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One of the signs of true love is never having to think about other options outside of your relationship. You don't wonder if there are potential mates out there for you, instead focusing all your attention on the object of your affection.
As one study published in Family Relations found, a partner's effort directly influences relationship satisfaction and lowers risk of divorce. Researchers also determined that the motivation of both partners can improve the security they feel with not only each other, but their relationship overall.
2. There's only one person you want to flirt with
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Single people are used to flirting, subtly or overtly, and usually go out of their way to do so with multiple people. They may maintain eye contact or gently touch the person they're flirting with to let them know they're interested. But the same cannot be said for couples who have a once in a lifetime true love.
When the signs of true love present themselves in this way, it means you only have eyes for one person. And even if you're already dating that person or are married to them, continuing to flirt in a partnership has incredible benefits.
3. You do things to bring happiness to your partner without expecting anything in return
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Sometimes, we do things expecting something in return, whether it's money, a trade of some kind, or even a favor for future use. However, when someone does something for the sole purpose of making their partner happy, and not expecting anything in return, this is a glaring sign of true love you only find once in a lifetime.
People in healthy, happy relationships have the motivation to give each other what they need. Whether it's taking out the garbage, doing the dishes, or getting the kids ready for school, this kind of soulmate-level love is very hard to come by.
4. You trust the other person with your most vulnerable secrets
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It's not easy to be completely transparent, even if you've known someone for years and even share a bed with them. But when you're with the person you truly and deeply love, it becomes effortless to share those innermost parts of yourself with them. True love gives you the courage and safety to be real. And doing so with your partner means you've found a lasting connection.
According to licensed clinical social worker Terry Gaspard, "Vulnerability fosters deeper connections, promotes open communication, and encourages self-acceptance... it leads to increased intimacy and a more authentic expression of self within the relationship. Vulnerability can also help individuals learn to regulate complicated feelings and cope with challenges more effectively."
5. You're excellent collaborators
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Relationships succeed when both partners treat each other as equals and work as a team. As psychologist Mark Travers explained, the "sense of being a team, the internal experience that we are oriented toward each other, responding to the world together, and carrying life jointly" is what teamwork means in a relationship.
Unfortunately, sometimes couples will compete with one another in unhealthy ways. However, true love leads two people to work together as teammates and true partners in the most important aspects of life.
6. The joys far outweigh the struggles
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No relationship is without problems and arguments are to be expected in any healthy partnership. But it shouldn't always be gloom and doom. The best relationships are those that have incredible moments that create lasting memories, and it's one of the many signs of true love when there are way more highs than lows.
Whether it's small acts of kindness "just because" or celebrating milestone moments together, joy will always overcome struggles in a truly loving relationship.
7. You don't feel the need to change the other person
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Growth in a relationship is to be expected, but when you're with someone, it means accepting them for who they are. When one partner tries to change the other, whether it's their bad habits or criticizing their personality, it can create resentment and conflict.
In fact, trying to change them shows it's not real love. Why would you want to change someone instead of helping them become a better version of themselves? For couples with the kind of true love you only find once in a lifetime, they have no need to mold their partner into someone else.
8. Your partner inspires you toward greatness
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The best partners know how to encourage each other onward and upward. They're their partner's biggest fan and supporter, and are there for them every step of the way as they accomplish their goals. They even lend a listening ear and shoulder to cry on along the way, and genuinely care about their feelings.
Not only does being a supportive partner increase relationship satisfaction, but it makes their mater feel more confident in themselves and their abilities. Their partner is acting as an inspiration in their journey to personal growth and success.
9. You're still going strong after the honeymoon phase
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The early stages of romance can be misleading with all the supercharged emotions. Both partners may show a side of themselves that isn't authentic, despite being happy and carefree with one another. The honeymoon phase involves frequent calls and texts, intense physical attraction, planning for the future, and avoiding any arguments along the way.
But true love that you only find once in a lifetime grows deeper even as infatuation fades. For couples who have made it through the honeymoon phase and are still going strong, still feeling deeply connected to each other, it's a powerful sign of true love.
10. You've overcome obstacles
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Couples will surely face struggles and obstacles in their relationship, whether it's over daily disagreements or much larger issues they have. But love must be tested by adversity to know if it's sturdy enough to last a long time.
If you've gone through challenges or difficulties in your relationship, but have come out the other side stronger than ever, it means your love is built to last. Relationships aren't meant to be easy, but that hard work is incredibly important, as it "involves self-examination, open communication, and a willingness to address conflicts and challenges head-on," as therapist John Kim explained.
11. Laughter comes easily and often
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Abundant humor in a relationship isn't just a source of great entertainment, it's also a sign of true love that's meant to stand the test of time. According to a study published in Personal Relationships, shared laughter boosts emotional closeness and support for one another, as well as improving overall relationship satisfaction.
Laughing with a partner on a daily basis is a lovely reminder of the connection you share with one another, and the joy you bring to each other's lives.
12. You don't feel the need to hide your quirks and odd habits
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When you first begin a relationship with someone, you may hide your quirks or unique habits out of fear of judgment and rejection. Maybe you tend to chew gum when you get nervous or rewatch the same television shows for comfort; no matter what it is, you tell yourself that in order to form a connection, you can't be 100% yourself.
But in a healthy relationship, it means you can be authentic and don't have to bury those parts of yourself. When someone loves you for who you truly are, you don't have to pretend in any way, and it's a sign that you're with someone who really gets you.
13. You negotiate with win-win as the goal
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Life is full of compromises; it's what makes relationships go the distance. But sometimes, one partner may have their own needs in mind without caring about the needs of their other half.
As experts from Utah State University pointed out, "Every relationship requires compromise, but a partner who consistently puts their needs first can leave you feeling undervalued. Selfish behavior often reveals itself when one partner is only ever making decisions that benefit themselves... In a balanced relationship, both partners work together, weighing each other’s desires and making choices that benefit the relationship as a whole."
When your relationship is the kind of true love you only find once in a lifetime, you don't ever have to worry that your needs won't be met. Instead of one partner prioritizing themselves over the other, both of them seek solutions that are satisfying across the board.
14. You constantly think about growing old together
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Looking ahead can sometimes be frightening, especially if you're in the early stages of your relationship. But even for couples who have been together for years, thinking of the future can make their minds spiral. They may worry they aren't meant to last or that some hurdle will come between them.
But when you've found true love, there's nothing you can't handle with your partner by your side. No matter what life throws your way, you both know you will deal with it together, even decades from now when you're much older.
15. You feel blessed every day
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Deep-down gratitude for your partner and your good fortune at having found each other continually brightens your life. Even if you don't express that gratitude every single day to them, at least not verbally, you feel it deep inside. You may also show how you feel by doing small things for them, which are incredibly important in relationships.
You thank the universe daily for bringing you two together, and it's a beautiful thing. Because if you didn't have them in your life, you truly don't know where you'd be or who you'd become.
eHarmony is an online dating site that believes people deserve to find love — true love that comes with a lasting relationship.
