When Someone's Life Is Falling Apart, They'll Often Do These 10 Things Before Reaching Their Breaking Point
PeopleImages | ShutterstockThere are times in life when it feels like the world is ending and there's nothing we can do about it. While some people can feel themselves changing into someone they don't recognize, others might build up to this realization. Because whether it's a change in sleep patterns or a feeling of hopelessness, when someone's life is falling apart, they'll often do these things before reaching their breaking point.
For a person on the outside looking in, seeing someone they love go through this is heartbreaking. But when they're able to recognize certain indicators of a negative change, it's easier for them to offer support. And for the person going through this difficult time, they can begin to look inward to help themselves start thriving again.
When someone's life is falling apart, they'll often do these 10 things before reaching their breaking point
1. Not getting enough sleep
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Sleep is the most important thing for our bodies, and it's recommended we get between 7-9 hours of it each night, so it can feel downright frightening when someone isn't getting enough of it. For people who are falling apart, they may be suffering from anxiety or other mental health disorders.
As experts from the Mental Health Foundation explained, "Anxiety can cause your thoughts to race, which can make it hard to sleep." For people reaching their breaking point in their lives, it's essential that they not only seek professional help, but do things to wind down for bedtime to get a restful sleep.
2. Being unable to concentrate
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When someone's life is falling apart, they'll often feel unable to concentrate, which indicates they're reaching their breaking point. In fact, difficulty concentrating is the most common criteria used for diagnosing emotional disorders.
A person who feels like this might want to do as psychotherapist Jennifer Gerlach suggests: self-reflect. She encourages people to ask the following questions: Is there a need to be met? Do you need to be anywhere (are you neglecting your relationships to focus on your goals)? Does what you're doing still matter to you? If someone can understand the why, it will be much easier to find a solution.
3. Neglecting their hygiene
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Talking about hygiene is a sensitive topic, and someone reaching their breaking point may feel offended if their loved ones confront them about it. But if they're neglecting personal hygiene, it may indicate an emotional breakdown. According to a study published in PLOS One, "poor personal hygiene is known to be a feature of certain psychiatric conditions such as schizophrenia and depression."
For the loved ones of this person, it's essential that, in addition to recommending professional help, they suggest some self-care. Whether it's offering to try face masks or surprising them with a self-care kit, these bits of encouragement can help.
Registered nurse Ivory Smith Causey also recommends attaching bathing to the beginning and end of the work week, and to use bathing wipes if showering gets to be too much. Adds Causey, "If possible, splurge on quality soaps and shampoos. This act of self-care can be fun and make for a more pleasant showering experience."
4. Having concerning eating habits
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Food is essential to our daily functioning, and what we eat can affect our mental health. It's concerning when someone has horrible eating patterns. Maybe they binge-eat or barely eat at all. Regardless, not having a consistent eating schedule indicates there's something wrong.
As another PLOS One study pointed out, "Dietary patterns and poor health behaviors [are] associated with depressive disorders and anxiety," and better eating patterns are associated with improved mental health. Even if this person is stuck in their ways, taking small steps, like cooking with friends or eating comfort foods, can improve the situation slightly.
5. Complaining about their health
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Whether it's calling attention to strange aches in their body or complaining of random soreness, when someone's life is falling apart, they'll often do these things before reaching their breaking point. Unfortunately, people who have emotional disorders can experience physical symptoms like tingling or constant headaches.
According to one study published in the Journal of Adolescent Health, our mental health can directly and indirectly affect our health, with stress negatively impacting our immune functioning, for example. This, in turn, can lead to an increased risk of viral infections. Additionally, people with mental health disorders are more likely to engage in risky behavior, which can lead to worsening health.
6. Losing interest in things they once enjoyed
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When someone loses interest in activities they once enjoyed, it should raise some alarm bells not only for their social circle, but for themselves as well. They may not feel like themselves and no longer care for hobbies they spent hours doing.
Psychology educator Kendra Cherry pointed out, "Loss of interest can create a cycle from which it's hard to break free. Because of decreased interest, you might stop spending time with others and engaging in things that normally help you feel less stressed. This increased isolation, decreased activity, and lower social support can then play a part in making you feel more anxious and depressed."
7. Having unpredictable mood swings
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When a person experiences mood swings, one minute they're happy and the next they're not. And while they may not require a clinical diagnosis, it's important that they're aware of this instability, as it may indicate a mood disorder, in addition to other underlying mental health issues.
"People with mood disorders experience a decreased quality of life; if they have depressive episodes, they may feel irritable, worthless, or uninterested in things they normally care about... If they experience episodes of mania, they may feel overly energetic or on a natural high, with racing thoughts and words that pour out more quickly than usual," psychiatrist Paula Zimbrean explained.
And as a study published in the British Journal of Psychiatry revealed, although mood instability is common, it can also point to psychiatric disorders. Again, it's best for their loved ones to encourage seeking help.
8. Feeling hopeless
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If someone is feeling hopeless, they may feel unmotivated or have convinced themselves that their life has no future. Unfortunately, this state of mind is serious. In fact, a 2023 study found that hopelessness increased loneliness, depression, and dangerous thoughts.
They may find it difficult to remain positive and feel like a bad friend when their close-knit circle dumps problems on them. But it's at this point that encouragement from loved ones is essential before they ever reach that breaking point.
9. Withdrawing from friends and family
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When someone's life is falling apart, they'll often self-isolate and withdraw from their loved ones, usually before reaching their breaking point. Because social connections are essential for our health and well-being, it's concerning when a person hides themselves away from social settings.
Even if a person has plenty of social support, they may still pull away, declining invitations to go out, dodging prying questions from friends, or making excuses to be alone and at home. Unfortunately, more than 33% of people over 45 feel lonely, with 25% those over 65 years of age being isolated socially.
10. Being highly critical of themselves
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Because they feel like their life is falling apart and are struggling with their own self-worth, people reaching their breaking point will be incredibly critical of themselves. Perhaps they think they can't do the simplest things correctly or that small physical "flaws" make them unworthy of happiness.
As psychologist Allison Kelly explained, "Although self-criticism may serve certain functions, the research overwhelmingly shows that self-criticism is more harmful than helpful. In addition, although it may feel as though self-criticizing will help us to change our behaviors, recent research shows that being self-compassionate is more effective in this regard."
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, and family topics.
