Kids Who Know Their Parents Actually Mean What They Say Usually Have 11 Rare & Useful Traits As Adults
bearmoney / ShutterstockThere’s a saying that goes, ‘Talk is cheap.’ It means it’s easier to say something than to follow through. Some parents are guilty of talking a big game without actually doing what they said they would.
Parenting is hard. On one hand, parents may want to be tough with their kids to teach them hard lessons before the world does. On the other hand, the loudest voice in their head often encourages them to try to be their child's best friend and give them whatever they want. Finding a balance between the two things can be complicated. What matters to most parents is being the best they can be for their children, and often, that means being consistent. When parents say what they mean, and their kids know they mean it, it can give them rare and useful traits as adults.
Kids who know their parents actually mean what they say usually have 11 rare & useful traits as adults
1. They are trusting
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Trust doesn’t come easily or naturally to some people. It can be hard to assume people have the best intentions. Plus, when you’ve endured constant lying, especially in childhood, it can be hard to put faith in anyone. If someone’s parents were modeling distrustful behavior, it can set them up for a life without trust. Being unable to trust their own parents can make people struggle in adulthood.
On the other hand, kids who grew up with parents who actually meant what they said may be more trusting. Learning between trust and mistrust is one of the most critical phases in a child’s life, psychologists believe. When parents say something and follow through, they teach their kids that they can trust them. This can make them not only trust others but also become trustworthy individuals.
2. They are grounded
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Some children grow up in homes where their parents say one thing, but do the opposite. They may threaten to punish them if they do something, but never follow through. Now, the child thinks it’s okay to act a certain way, as they know there won’t be any consequences. They may try to get away with things for the rest of their lives, assuming people will let them get away with it. It can make them full of themselves as adults, believing they are truly untouchable.
Kids who grew up in a home where their parents meant what they said may end up completely different. They can be naturally grounded in a complicated world. It could be due to the punishments they received, which made them realize they are not invincible, or the guidance they were shown that everyone deserves respect. It’s a rare trait that can come along with living with consistent parents.
3. They are reliable
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Do you know someone you know you can turn to for anything? Whether it’s a late-night phone call for reassurance or a small loan when you’re in a pickle? They are the person you’d make your emergency contact, and someone you’d turn to in times of need. Reliable people are special. Not everyone has this rare trait, and it may be because of how they were raised.
When they were kids, their parents were likely reliable. If they said they would do something, they’d follow through. This behavior was modeled to them, and they might be more likely to practice it in their adult lives.
4. They are emotionally intelligent
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Emotionally intelligent people are in tune with their feelings. It can seem easier to run away from our problems. Maybe that means ignoring them entirely or burying our pain deep down inside ourselves. We all have different coping mechanisms, but often, they don’t involve being vulnerable. Emotionally intelligent people know that there is strength in vulnerability, and managing our feelings is one of the most important things we can do.
Understanding and embracing emotions may come easily to someone who was raised in a home with parents who actually meant what they said. They were likely modeled to exhibit this behavior, as they watched their parents do the same.
5. They are confident
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Confidence goes a long way. However, it can be hard to form when you grew up around rather wishy-washy parents. Sometimes, they may have supported you; other times, they might have left you alone to deal with it on your own. Growing up in an unsteady household where parents would say one thing but not follow through could be damaging to one’s confidence. It’s likely easier for kids who grew up with parents they could rely on to develop this trait.
Parents who stood behind their word taught their kids that there is something to be proud of in staying true to themselves. Their kids may have learned from their behavior and become confident in themselves.
6. They are independent
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Kids who grew up with parents who said what they meant had consistency in their lives. If their parents told them no, the answer was no. They weren’t going to have them come around later with a different answer. This may have made them more independent. If their parents told them to do their own laundry, they had no other choice. They couldn’t wait for them to change their minds, because they were firm on what they said from the beginning.
Some parents would tell their kids to do something, but then pick up the slack for them when they failed to do it themselves. Whether it was cleaning or on a school project, they meant well, but they might have set them up for failure.
7. They are problem-solvers
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Growing up, did your parents ever tell you to figure it out on your own? Not because they wanted to set you up for failure, but quite the opposite. They wanted you to try your best to come up with a solution or tackle a task without help. By doing this, they were teaching you life skills. I know my parents did this, but sometimes they would change their minds when I would come to them asking for help. They’d go back on their word, and I may have become a less productive problem-solver because of it.
By keeping their word, they raised good problem-solvers. These kids knew that if they didn’t figure it out on their own, their parents wouldn’t be right there to fix it for them.
8. They are resilient
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Kids raised by consistent parents may have an easier time bouncing back from problems. Growing up, they likely had guidance over these things. When their parents taught them a lesson, they took it to heart. It stuck with them. They learned problem-solving techniques and confidence that made them more resilient in adulthood.
With resilience comes a calm sense of the world around them. They know that things are going to be difficult at times, but that it’s important to bounce back. Their parents may have encouraged them to do so with their consistent parenting.
9. They are accountable
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No-nonsense parents said what they meant and didn’t waver. If they asked their kids to have something done by the time they got home from work, it wasn’t an option. They couldn’t ignore it or save it for later. They knew their parents held their word, and if they didn’t live up to the expectations, they’d likely get in trouble. It may have made them more accountable people.
People who hold themselves accountable for their actions likely learned this trait in childhood. Their parents would make sure they did exactly what was asked of them, and if they made a mistake, they had to own up to it.
10. They are adaptable
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Change isn’t easy for everyone. While some people thrive in new settings, others do not. Growing up, some parents ensured their children had experiences that needed adaptability. Whether it was a move, a new school, or a change in routine, they wanted their kids to accept change and move forward. If they said something was going to change, their children knew it would. They quickly adapted to their new situation.
Some parents may say one thing but mean another. Or they fail to follow through with their word entirely. This can make kids unsure of the world around them. This can make them less adaptable.
11. They are empathetic
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When children are taught to show empathy to others, they pick up the trait and practice it in their adult life. Parents who actually meant what they said may have fostered kindness in their children. If they were told to be kind to kids at school or required to spend quality time with an aging family member, the kids knew they had to follow through, or their parents wouldn’t be happy with them. These situations taught them how to meet people with kindness. It may have taught them to form deep connections and meet others with empathy.
Empathy modeled by parents is powerful. It can teach children how to be more respectful adults. Parents who act empathetically and follow through on their word can make a difference.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
